We often wonder what is the secret of raising happy and well-behaved children. The first answer might seem like discipline but that is where a majority of the parents go wrong. It is important to create a closer connection with your child. You might love them but feel they need to be disciplined in order to be well behaved! However, that is not exactly how it may work. The love that we have for them must be put into action each day. They need to feel that love and then there will a very less need for discipline.
Putting your action into love means making our child the highest priority, paying close attention to what they do and say, and making them feel valued. All this and some more things given below are ways in which you can stay connected with your child and ensure that they turn out as wonderful human beings.
Build a firm base
The parent-child connection starts building right from the time these little human beings are babies. Build a great bond with your child right at the outset and nurture this relationship right through to adulthood.
Work on this relationship
As children grow older, the natural parent-child bond starts to fizzle out. Just like a marriage, it is important to work on this bond too. Children love their parents naturally and we should try our best to not let this love disappear through our actions.
Your time with them is priority
Between all the office work and house work that we do, the time that we spend with children is of utmost importance. They may not open out to you immediately. However, when they see that you pay attention to and are interested in even the little things they do, they will share everything with you.
Trust is the foundation of a relationship
Infants naturally depend on their mothers and trust begins in infancy. When we make a promise to our children as they grow older, we earn their trust by fulfilling that promise. At the same time, we extend our trust to them by expecting the best from them and believing in their fundamental goodness and potential.
Encouragement is essential
Children are like plants. If a plant has brown leaves, you don’t criticize it and yell at it to straighten up and grow. Same goes for kids too. Too much of criticism or correction can make them feel worthless. It is important to encourage them for good behavior and make them realize that you are by their side no matter what.
Respect is mutual
It is very common for adults to behave like a boss with kids. Set limits for them but with respect. The respect and dignity that we expect out of them should be given to them as well. This way they learn to respect their parents and other people.
Communication starts early
You have many important things to do every day. However, the constant chit chat and banter that kids indulge in with us is equally essential. If you give them a patient hearing now, they are more likely to share their bigger problems and fears later on in life. Stay available for them all the time.
Remember that connecting with your child is a state of mind. Your child will sense your emotional availability. With a demanding job nowadays and other responsibilities, it is difficult to keep track of everything together. However, if children feel that there are other things more important to their parents, they may look elsewhere in times of an emotional need. This is more of our loss than theirs.